Finally ... Freedom from the Myth of Superwoman

Or... Why the Have-it-All Woman has decided she doesn't actually want it all.....


Yes, I admit it; I was one of those women a few years ago who bought into this myth; no, more than that, I swallowed it hook, line and sinker. Yes, the strong, feminist women who went before me told me I could have it all - naturally then I thought I could have a high paying, high profile, high stress job and seamlessly and concurrently combine it with studying for two Masters Degrees, raising a son as a single parent, ensuring that I had the house as neat as the home in pages of Home Beautiful, that my son had fresh vegies and fruit and a wholesome cooked meal every night, that I got to the gym four nights a week, to the netball court once a week and to the P&C meetings at my son's school on a regular basis. Funnily enough, my health suffered as did my relationships with family and friends....I wasn't happy with myself and I wasn't a fun person to be around.

Now, I love curling up with a good CSI-type thriller, but I used to get an enormous attack of the guilts if I read one of these novels or a trashy gossip mag instead of a text book. Yep folks, for a while there, this girl next door got a little too carried away with trying to emulate the picture-perfect lives of the Modern Day Superwomen I used to read about.

Oh, sure....it's oh-so-fucking easy to have four kids and a stellar career, while looking immaculate, saving the world and maintaining a steamy love life with a fellow high achiever - when you've got millions of dollars and an army of assistants, nannies, chefs and personal trainers at your disposal (not naming any names.....Brangelina !)

Who was I kidding trying to do all that ? And, more importantly, why would I want to when spending hours hanging out and riding my motorbike with my husband or laughing with my son while wearing trackie daks and a holey t-shirt is infinitely more rewarding ?

So, I'm on a quest ..... a quest to give up the guilt; trying to do everything perfectly just leads to frustration and sets myself up for failure and misery. So, in 2008 I pledge to learn the lost art of delegation and saying no and to stopping doing things out of obligation. Will the world end if I buy rather than bake a cake for my son's school fete ? Does the bookcase really need dusting this very second, or would 30mins spend relaxing with one of the books be more helpful ?

Rather than running around like a headless chook, I'm going to start to take a good hard look at what truly needs to be done today.....then I'm going to do those things the best way I can - but I won't panic if the results are not 100% - and I am going to make time for myself. If I'm happy, then Tex and Zach and others around me will be happy, too.